jocelynseip:

stangersinthewind:

theysaythatkatiesgotsoul:

*PHONE RINGS*
“Hello, you’ve reached Alan Rickman at 555-0122.  Please leave a message at the beep.”
*BEEP*
“Hello, Alan Rickman.  It’s Alan Rickman reminding you to remove the pork chops from the freezer to the refrigerator so they defrost properly.  Do not disappoint me.”
*PHONE RINGS*
“Hello, you’ve reached Alan Rickman at 555-0122.  Please leave a message at the beep.”
*BEEP*
“Alan, it’s me again.  Remember that turtle joke for the party.  Hurr hurr hurr.”